Baby Got Books
by Lady Reads-A-Lot
I like big books and I cannot lie
You other readers can’t deny
That when a book jumps in your itty bitty hands
And a square thing in your face you get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
Cause I noticed that book was stuffed
Deep in the bag you’re wearing
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna read witcha
And take yo picture
My homegirls tried to warn me
But that book you got is better than porn-y
Ooh Leather Smoothskin
You say you wanna get in my lens?
Well use me, use me
‘Cause I ain’t your average groupie
It’s better than dancin’;
Even got some romancin’,
I sweat, I fret,
Got it goin’ like a turbo Vette.
I’m tired of magazines
Sayin’ tv is the thing
Take the average reader and ask her that
She thinks books are phat
So, fellas,
(Yeah!)
Fellas!
(Yeah!)
Does your girlfriend read a book?
(Hell yeah!)
Tell her to shake it, shake it, shake that favorite book
Baby got books
I like ’em rectangular and big
And when I’m buyin’ like a pig
I just can’t help myself
I’m acting like an animal
Now here’s my scandal
I want to get you home
And uh, double-up, uh-uh.
I ain’t talkin’ bout Playboy
Silicone parts are made for toys (But the articles are pretty damn good.)
I want ’em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy novel
Reads-a-Lot’s in deep
Beggin’ for another quick peek
So I’m lookin’ at movie videos
Book version plots playin’ like hoes
You can have them bimbos
Remember those nails on Flo Jo?
A word to the thick book mastas, I wanna get witcha
I might cuss or throw ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna
read til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin on
A lot of you won’t like this song
Cause them punks like to skim it and quit it
But I’d rather stay all day
So ladies
(Yeah!)
Ladies!
(Yeah!)
If you wanna drive a Mercedes,
Then read a book, and read some more
All the smart boys got to shout.
Baby got books.
So your boyfriend hates to read
And only likes tv
But tv ain’t gonna make the heart grow fonder
His anaconda don’t get none unless he’s got books, hon
You can do sidebends or situps
But please don’t lose those books!
Some brothers want to play that hard role
And tell you that books aren’t gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So Cosmo says you’re nerdy
It ain’t down or dirty
But your cover is slick and your pages are kickin’
I’m thinkin’ bout stickin’ (my head in a book.)
To the brainless dames in the magazines,
You ain’t it, Miss Thang
So ladies if the book is good
And you want to talk about it in the hood
Call 1-800-READS-A-LOT
And bring some wine if you could.
Baby got books.
Little bit mental but she got much books.
Little bit mental but she got much books.
Little bit mental but she got much books.
(Inspired by the one and only knighted rapper I know of; the one who, when interviewed on VH1’s I Love the 80’s, noted that he looks like “a big dancing turd” on the large white buttocks in the video. Why didn’t they make them black? In fact, they’re yellow. Anyway, cheers to you, Sir Mix-a-lot, you made my 80’s a lot more fun and I thank you for paying tribute to lovely, non-stick figure women.)